out of these ashes

The season of Lent is here. I didn't grow up in a church or denomination that observed Lent, so I just assumed for a long time that it was something nearly only Catholics did. I am not even sure how old I was when I first heard the term, but I am pretty sure I didn't even know what it was and I probably still don't fully understand today. However, I still embrace it in my own way. And it is probably nothing like the way the rest of the world embraces it. But that's okay and really doesn't matter.

Tonight I went to my first actual Ash Wednesday service. I say actual, because for the past 3 years I have attended the noonday Lent services at Cathedral of the Advent that begin on Ash Wednesday. But this was the first time to attend an actual service where I ashes were placed on my forehead. It was a beautiful service and the experience of it all was most meaningful. Over the last 10 years, the season of Lent/Easter has become my very favorite time of the year. I do not like to view it as a holiday, but as a very special season to better understand and appreciate Christ and to delve deeper into Scripture and cultivate my faith in Him. It encourages me to continue my thirst, hunger, and desire for His Word, presence, and love. May this Lent season be a message to my heart to store up my treasures in Christ alone and not in the things of this world that are but dust.

Lent can mean a lot of things to a lot of different people. Some give up chocolate or TV. But I think it is far more than giving up something. For me, Lent is a season of reflection, examination, prayer, and forgiveness. It is a season of examining my heart's condition from the inside out and seeing what sins reside there that prevent me from being closer to the LORD. As I look ahead at this season, I am reminded that without the redemption of Christ, I am but dust and will depart as dust without hope or eternal life. I am reminded of my wicked heart that needs to be ignited by God's grace and judgment. 

This is a season of giving up my broken, woeful, sinful soul and asking for God's help and forgiveness to redeem and restore my soul to Him. It is a time to give up the fight against the enemy and cling to the victory and defense of God's righteousness. This is a season of giving up my heart to be filled with His grace and beauty and putting away the things that are not of Christ. It is the time where I find my deepest need for prayer, fasting, and my trust in Him. Lent isn't a New Year's resolution or a diet program, it is a season of burning my sins of the things I've been letting control me and heart and seeing myself become beauty among ashes. It is the preparation for God's eternal sacrifice of His only Son who entered this world humbly in our flesh in a stall, humbly arrived on a donkey as our King, and humbly hung to His death as our Savior on a cross for the forgiveness of ruined sinners like me. 

May my heart be more like His--loving, forgiving, gracious, patient, generous, obedient, understanding, and humble. He is a God of second chances. The God of deep, overwhelming love, outrageous grace, and the healer of brokenness. The God of empathy and understanding. The God of kindness and humility. His life on earth was everything I strive to be, and fail at daily. He gave up His glory and majesty and took on humility for the sake of my own lowly bondage, sin, and sorrow; because of His death,  I am learning to pour out myself before Him daily in total surrender. Out of these ashes, may I find a beautiful, contrite heart only found in Christ. This is a season of dying to self and letting Christ in. "And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God." - Romans 8:27

"He must increase, but I must decrease." - John 3:30